Shock led to sadness, sadness got us anger and with anger came revolt. The revolt offered hope. The Making of Breaking Free by Sridhar Raghavan
A still from Breaking Free
It was while shooting for a film for UNAIDS on the status of HIV/AIDS intervention in India and interviewing the people who work at different community based organizations across India that something got going inside me. As I recorded their personal stories, I was brought face to face with the grit and grime of what it meant to be a hijra or a transsexual or a gay/bisexual man from the lower economic strata where one does not have the power to negotiate or stand up for one’s rights. It brought me face to face with ‘reality’.
Personal stories of several gay and transgender persons prodded me to take a hard look into why they are stigmatised, why they are constantly harassed by the police or by their families and how they yet tried to stand up for what they believed in – for their identity, their love, their dignity. What emerged was a portrait of a community on the verge of revolt, of men and women ready to break free; as well as a mainstream society in transition, caught between old social mores and a globalised outlook of a shrinking world. Breaking Free is about this change, this transformation where sexual minorities in India are claiming their right to live and love with dignity.
A still from Breaking Free
When I started shooting in 2007, I wanted to just capture what is happening with the community. I didn’t have a concrete idea for a film. Interesting developments were taking place during that time. As a gay man, it made me both happy and anxious. As a film-maker I wanted to capture these changes, to analyse, examine and understand them.
The 2009 High Court verdict reading down Sec 377, the outburst of openness among the community, LGBTQ events springing up across India, the Sec 377 litigation, the changing portrayals of sexual minorities in films and news, the Pride Marches in several cities – they were all happening dizzyingly around me. With limited resources, but with great enthusiasm, my team and I tried to capture some of these events. It was a learning process for me – about queer identities, the law, the litigation and the cruelty of the law enforcers. Sec 377 of the Indian Penal code seem to be the focus point from which all these radiated.
A still from Breaking Free
Having made couple of feature films and shorts on gay and transgender characters, I was of course in tune with the community’s ‘heart’. But my earlier works were all fictional, though they combined Bollywood drama with neo-realism. Here, with the documentary format I was in startling contact with reality in its truest form. I was now peeping into the ‘minds’ of the people. A completely different experience for me, but one which was surely the most natural progression of my work curve.
I soon realised, as I started piecing this film together, that a lot more work needs to be done – many more interviews to be shot, many more events to be sourced (through news clips and archival footage if available). Breaking Free, I felt had the potential to be a docu feature that could bring international attention to the struggle for rights by sexual minorities in India; act as a wake-up call for the Indian society to realise what is happening amidst them and also be an inspirational tool for the LGBTQ community itself for spreading hope.
Sridhar Rangayan behind the camera
Since there are hardly any resources for funding LGBTQ films in India, I had to resort to crowdfunding which was done on an international and Indian platform each. We brought in some money, far lesser than what the target was, but nevertheless we got started. What was really encouraging and heartening was that so many people across the world who contributed to the crowdfunding campaign believed in the film and its mission to document the movement.
Also so many people and organisations offered their support by organising interviewees, space for shoot, archival materials, et al. Organisations like The Humsafar Trust, Orinam, Saathii, Gay Bombay, Mitr Trust, Sangama and Alternative Law Forum came out in support. I am indebted to them greatly.
Behind the camera from Breaking Free
I knew that I was compelled to make this film, but I least expected that I would be compelled to share my own story on camera. While shooting the gay, lesbian, transgender people and recording their stories, I suddenly felt like a voyeur, like a person standing outside and looking in. Also I have been involved closely with the community for over two decades as an activist, involved in many of the ups and downs that beset us. That’s when I felt I had to be in the film, my story needs to be there too, interwoven. I had to be an Insider. Finally it was my Breaking Free moment too!
The film began to take shape as a personal journey that was intertwined with the journey of the Indian LGBTQ movement. From then on, I also started documenting myself too. Earlier I was only doing the additional camera for all our shoots, now I kind of became a video-selfie expert!
Over 8 years, traveling across India, I started piecing together the Sec 377 jig-saw puzzle. With no budget at all, it was a small motley crew of a cameraperson who also doubled up as a sound recordist, a camera attendant who also doubled up as lightman, and me who multitasked as director, production manager, additional cameraperson, interviewer, etc!
Again since there was no budget, it was usually a new cameraperson and new attendant in each city. And it would be my duty to sensitise them to LGBTQ issues before starting the shoot so they don’t make a gaffe. However I could see their jaws drop when they heard candid stories of LGBTQ persons – some of which they were amused by, and many of them which they were really touched by. I believe that the very process of making LGBTQ films is a sensitising process by itself, creating awareness even within the shooting spaces.
In the end, we had hours and hours of footage and that’s where our editor, who basically is an editor of narrative feature films, came to the rescue. His sharp sense of telling a story that is engaging, by removing all the fluff, and keeping only what is needed for the story, shaped the film into a tight edit. And I wanted to always ensure that at no place the film will veer towards sensationalism or jingoism. I was keen to present the facts as they were and let the audience be the judge.
Another person who kept the film on track is Saagar Gupta, producer of the film and co-writer of the film’s narrative arc. His strength in research and digging up information, press clips and archival videos was put to good use in this project. Also, he steered it into a direction that is objective, yet subjective. He ensured that the film lives up to its mission and purpose.
Breaking Free is one of the most difficult films I have made, not only the process with zero budget, but also because the stories of people were really heart wrenching. The sufferings many of them had gone through – rape, torture, blackmail and isolation – also made me introspect about the privileges I had by being a man, who belonged to an upper caste and had access to education. Saying this indeed is a sad reflection, but it is true as many of the people I met did not enjoy these privileges that I took for granted.
And the most difficult to document was the day of the Supreme Court judgment on 11.12.2013. I was shooting real time the community watching the breaking news on TV. The negative judgment was completely unexpected for me. Though I had already interviewed several lawyers who were working on the case just few days before and they did seem not very positive, this complete reversal was a shock – to everyone.
What was more shocking was the reason they gave – that Sec 377 was not used concretely in sufficient number of cases and that it impacted only a miniscule minority. Breaking Free proves both these wrong – it offers testimonials of LGBTQ people who were actually victimised under the law and also shows the sweeping movement where thousands of people are out and open. The Supreme Court’s insensitivity and complete disregard for constitutional values of human rights was shocking.
After shock came sadness, and after sadness came anger, and with anger came revolt, and the revolt offered hope. We decided that Breaking Free should culminate in the reflection of this spectrum of emotions that I as a person, and also the LGBTQ community, was going through.
Breaking Free is a pendulum of truth that swings between despair and hope, people’s strength and protests, privacy and politics. I hope the film is successful in showing a naked mirror to the authorities, highlight the history of the Indian LGBTQ movement, and at the same time inspire the youth to surge ahead to claim the basic rights that the constitution guarantees to every citizen of India.
